This week's habit, seek first to understand, then to be understood, is surrounded by the idea of empathetic listening. In general, people want to be heard and they have their opinions ready to share. What this habit forces us to do is, rather than be ready to instantly share our own opinion and thoughts, is it challenges us to first listen to other people's opinions and thoughts. Not only should we listen to their words, but we should think about their words and try to understand their point of view. When we do this, we show respect to that person, and also open up the door to a conversation. I try to explain this concept to my students all the time. I tell them "go ahead and put your hands down so that you can hear the directions." What I mean when I say this is, if their hand is in the air, they are only thinking about what they want to say and they are probably not hearing what others (or myself) are saying. When we have "class meetings" I try to acknowledge students who are modeling good listening and and good participation skills in a class discussion. When students are giving eye contact, nodding along to what the speaker is saying, and using respectful body language, the speaker feels that they are being listened to and that they are really "heard". Learning how to participate in a class discussion (or in any group discussion) is such an important life skill. My class has a meeting every Monday morning to start off the week. During this meeting we greet one another, we share special teacher news and special student news, we talk about any issues going on in the classroom or on the playground, we look at the week's schedule, choose class jobs, and we set class goals for the week. During this time I have very high expectations of my students. I really take time to highlight when students are being good listeners and participants in the discussion. I compliment students who wait to put their hand up until the speaker is finished talking. This week I am committing to teach my students about the word "empathy" and to practice empathetic listening. I will incorporate this new word into what we have already learned about good speaking and listening habits during a class discussion. I also am committing to practicing this in my own life. Seeking first to understand before being understood is a difficult and important habit, not only for working with students, but also for discussions with parents, colleagues, and family. This is a habit that will help me in my professional life but also in my personal friendships and relationships with others. I will also have the opportunity to share more habits at my faculty meeting this Friday! :)
2 Comments
Jessica Love
9/30/2015 06:38:21 pm
I love your Monday class meeting! A book I read this summer discussed how important it is to have time to debrief the weekend with your students and look ahead together. I'm sure modeling empathetic listening during this time is a highly valuable experience for them. I wish I could see it in action.
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Bill Robinson
10/3/2015 09:27:01 am
Lexie,
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Author"Motivation gets you started, and habits keep you going." Archives
October 2015
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